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Go Home Exterminate All The Brutes!

THE PLANK FEBRUARY 28, 2008

Exterminate All The Brutes!

BY DAYO OLOPADE

Glenn Greenwald is so right it hurts. Some key informatics from John Hagee, the wackjob evangelical preacher who is backing John McCain's campaign from Texas:

Towelheads are coming! "Islam in general -- those who live by the Koran have a scriptural mandate to kill Christians and Jews."

New Orleans is Sodom! "I believe that New Orleans had a level of sin that was offensive to
God, and they were recipients of the judgment of God for that."

I'll get you, Potter! "As millions of people anticipate the release
of the latest Harry Potter book and film, we're reminded once
again of Satan's ongoing attempt to deceive and destroy. The
whole purpose of the Potter books is to desensitize readers
and introduce them to the occult."

This is no worse than some of the inflammatory comments Farakkhan has dropped over the years--but given a minor toasting (as oposed to the full-panini-press Barack Obama got on Tuesday evening) on Hagee's comments, McCain said, "all I can tell you is that I am very proud to have Pastor John Hagee's support." Not a rejection or denouncement in sight.

The sad thing is McCain was on the right track with the "agents of intolerance" jab. But his unscrupulous desire to tack right for his general election campaign threatens a backslide into levels of intolerance that just curdle the mind.

--Dayo Olopade 

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30 comments

Little typo: there are two ens in Glenn Greenwald's first name.

And yes, Greenwald's spot-on here.

- Hungarian Great Bela Tarr

February 28, 2008 at 2:16pm

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Think Muslims enjoy eating babies?  You lose a few votes.

Think New Orleans deserved Katrina?  You get scolded by some talking heads.

Speak out again Harry Potter?  You just lost the election, bub.

- ratnerstar

February 28, 2008 at 2:29pm

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Of course, you could split the difference and say that, yes, while Muslims do enjoy eating babies, they only eat *bad* babies, so it is ok.

- boneill

February 28, 2008 at 2:45pm

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How long can you leave a baby in the fridge before it goes bad, anyway?  

- ratnerstar

February 28, 2008 at 3:00pm

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Hopefully no one will learn that Muslims eat only Muslim babies.

Because then, you know, it's back to the drawing board.

- williamyard

February 28, 2008 at 3:00pm

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I'd like to see TNR take down McCain for his remark yesterday that went something like...

"If we leave Iraq now, not only will Al Queda establish a base there, they will take over the country..."

That remark is physically insane, and pandering and fear-baiting of the worst kind.

Can anyone name a group of people who hates Al Queda more than the Iraqi Shi'a? Tell me again, how will 5000 Al Queda guys 'take Iraq over' from 15 million Shi'a?

- mmathog

February 28, 2008 at 3:00pm

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Yeah, mmathog, or the Kurds. Qaeda would get eaten alive by the Peshmerga.  There is part of me that wants to see them try.

- boneill

February 28, 2008 at 3:24pm

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The hell of it is yard, Sunnis eat Shi'ite babies and vice versa.  It is one of the few areans in which the spirit of ecumenicalism spurts forth.

The wierd part is that this exact conversation is happening at NRO, only they are serious.

- boneill

February 28, 2008 at 3:26pm

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This does give the Obama campaign the chance to win moderates by drawing this contrast. Perfect debate fodder, great in targeted mailings or radio/TV spots. Imagine giving those quotes, talking about "agents of intolerance," and then a voice asking, "Mr. McCain, is this really the kind of support you want?," or better, McCain himself saying how proud he is to have such support. What a fraud...

- BryanRDC

February 28, 2008 at 3:31pm

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As a pediatrician, I only recommend eating fresh babies.  Canned babies lack nutritional value, though frozen babies can be a decent substitute.

And, if I'm going to try to make an actual point here, it's for reasons like this that I can't even begin to consider supporting McCain.

- drdannyu

February 28, 2008 at 3:38pm

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bone- you might think so, but a quick check reveals that the Corner is no longer publishing anything not related to WFB.  Seriously.

- ratnerstar

February 28, 2008 at 3:38pm

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mmathog,

You asked "...how will 5000 Al Qaeda guys 'take Iraq over' from 15 million Shi'a?"

It's time-consuming, but doable. See above comments about baby-eating.

I figure if 500 Al Qaeda guys start out by eating one Shi'a baby a day for, say, five years...meanwhile the Shi'a population is shrinking and Al Qaeda is packing Weight Watchers classes...let's see:...7...6...carry the 4....okay, by June 23, 2017, you're running seriously low on Shi'a, and Al Qaeda has saved a fortune on take-out.

The real key is, if McCain is elected, how does keeping U.S. troops in Iraq forever reduce the Shi'a baby-eating? I don't want to cast aspersions on American/Iraqi know-how, but how does anyone know if the folks lining up for jobs at a Baghdad daycare center aren't Al Qaeda? I mean, you drop Junior off at Little Shi'a Preschool, they lock the doors from the inside, and it's chow time!  See, this is the kind of unforeseen contingency that nobody bothered to explore in the Iraq Study Group report. And McCain wonders why the electorate has soured on the war? Or sweet-and-soured, as the case may be.

And to those of you out there who insist that baby-eating isn't on Al Qaeda's agenda, I say you haven't been paying attention. Al Qaeda is basically like those flesh-eating rage virus killers in "28 Weeks Later," except Al Qaeda has better table manners, and also they kick back for a smoke once in a while.

Frankly, I'm surprised none of our presidential candidates has offered me a consulting gig.

- williamyard

February 28, 2008 at 3:42pm

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Oh I do see a difference between Farakkan and Hagee.  Hagee's rhetoric is passive.  Farakkan is actively inciting people to kill the jews.  And if you don't see the difference, you're either blind or selectively so.

With respect to Hagee's 3 comments, the first is absolutely true (read the koran and ask its followers), the second is offensive but he's not actively calling for New Orleanians' deaths, the third is a mere nothing,  I don't think Farakkan has ever said anything so mild in his life, and I'm including his everyday conversations with his dry cleaner.

- jwl2672

February 28, 2008 at 3:45pm

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drdan,

As you may know, eating the post-delivery placenta came back into vogue about the time Lamaze classes became de rigueur back in the '60s and '70s for every coastal hippie proto-parent.

More proof that Obama is a communist, if you connect the dots.

- williamyard

February 28, 2008 at 3:52pm

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mmathog.

If we leave Iraq and it turns into a killing field (as history as shown a jillion times), what will you say? "Oops?"

I don't think we'll even get that from you.  What was your response to the Cambodian killing fields after your hippie, pot-smoking days of "fighting the man? " Probably complete denial that it ever happened at the time.  And grudging acknowledgement later on with the caveat that it was that damned Johnson's fault.  After all, what the deuce is it to you who lives 7000 miles away? You don't have to live with the consequences of your actions.

You losers are all the same.  Bitch about the Afghan war until the Iraq war starts.  Then bitch about the Iraq war until the tide turns.  Then bitch about the economy until it gets better.  The world was made by doers and not losers who sit around bitching and moaning about every little thing that is allegedly going poorly.

- jwl2672

February 28, 2008 at 3:54pm

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"Bitch about the Afghan war until the Iraq war starts."

I wildly supported that invasion, I only bitched that we didn't send more troops and more money.

"You don't have to live with the consequences of your actions."

That's a strange thing for someone who supported the Iraqi invasion to say to someone who opposed it.

"The world was made by doers and not losers who sit around bitching and moaning about every little thing that is allegedly going poorly."

You mean like Wall St. screaming at Ben Bernanke to bail them out?

The irony about you jwl is that supposedly you represent the 'tough guy' party, but you're pretty much have the thinnest skin and are the biggest crybaby around here. It probably hurts your feelings that Nancy Pelosi likes balsamic vinegar.

- mmathog

February 28, 2008 at 4:09pm

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Bill, every so often the nurses on the OB floor will get into a discussion about some of the more... shall we say, back-to-the-earth mothers?  Apparently, only one local mother has ever asked for her placenta to eat.  From what I hear, there are recipes you can find online for such delicacies as placenta jerky.  Having seen my share of placentas, I am hard pressed to think of anything more revolting to eat...but that's just my patriarchal, Western oppressor Madison Avenue plastic fantastic mindset talking.

- drdannyu

February 28, 2008 at 4:16pm

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And thus we now know how to tell the difference between hippies and terrorists: Hippies eat the placenta, terrorists eat the baby!

And what do you call somebody who eats BOTH? Hungry!

Does Al Qaeda use the expression "throwing out the bath water with the baby"?

I don't know about placenta jerky. A friend of mine adopted a crack baby, which was a jerky baby, but not baby jerky.  (So does that make crack jerky jerky jerky?)

As for canned placenta: imagine the plopping sound it makes as it slides from the can to writhe and hiss in the skillet.  Cans of Bud in a styrofoam cooler in the corner.  The kitchen packed with friends and family--a poker debt paid, a separated couple eyeing each other warily, filthy children chasing each other between the forest of adult legs.  The cook turns the placenta and shakes in some fresh ground pepper. Someone imitates his boss and half the room cracks up.  A joint passes around, or is waved off. Somebody sees the latest refrigerator art and thinks, "Geez, I have to spend more time with my nephew, he's growin' up fast."

I want to say to all the young Pakistani men, the discontented Indonesians, the nervous Somali teenagers--see, we're not so bad, just a bunch of cut-ups, we got kids and problems and crappy jobs like everybody else, and we suffer and die, too, just like you.

And, once in a while, we like a nice freshly harvested placenta, with a glass of red maybe. Just like you guys like the occasional poached baby.

- williamyard

February 28, 2008 at 5:16pm

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mmathog-

The irony about you jwl is that supposedly you represent the 'tough guy' party, but you're pretty much have the thinnest skin and are the biggest crybaby around here. It probably hurts your feelings that Nancy Pelosi likes balsamic vinegar.

Brilliant.  

jwl, most of us agree that a precipitous withdrawal would be a disaster (and seriously, this is TNR, not the Nation, so grow the fuck up and stop talking your idiot "stupid hippie" talk).   But it is untrue that al-Qaeda would take over the country.  They might have a base, but they are not welcomed by the huge majority of Iraqis, everyone of which, apparently, has access to guns and Semtex.   Pakistan is a far bigger threat in terms of radical Islamism.  McCain is wrong to think that Iraq would turn into Afghanistan.  The problem would be the violence and the vacuum.  

And NO ONE blames Johnson for Cambodia.  I blame Pol Pot and then Nixon, who destroyed the country leaving it in tatters, opening the way for the Khmer Rouge to begin their evil march...

- boneill

February 28, 2008 at 5:16pm

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"The irony about you jwl is that supposedly you represent the 'tough guy' party, but you're pretty much have the thinnest skin and are the biggest crybaby around here. It probably hurts your feelings that Nancy Pelosi likes balsamic vinegar."

I agree, mmat -- the thing that continually surprises me about conservatives is how sensitive they are.  They mug for the camera like tough guys but are made uneasy by someone teaching a class on deconstructionism in Nowhere State U or by the fact that peope like to drive a car that actually works.

I'd also like to point out that the Whole Foods Edible Baby brands are totally overpriced -- why people fall for that "organic" image thing, I don't know -- and Trader Joe's has just as good for almost three bucks cheaper.

- ironyroad

February 28, 2008 at 5:20pm

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"More proof that Obama is a communist, if you connect the dots."

Wait, a crypto-Muslim communist?  That's a bit of a reach, though it does have a certain ring to it.

- jm_rice

February 28, 2008 at 5:29pm

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I...drink...your...babyshake!

- adisarro

February 28, 2008 at 5:42pm

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adisarro:

From "There Will Be Stretch Marks," right? I gotta rent that.

- williamyard

February 28, 2008 at 5:59pm

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Yard. I swear. Could have used some depends after reading your last placenta meditation. Too much. Good lord. Your fortunate to have this forum. Your own special Tourette release valve.

- boxofrox

February 29, 2008 at 8:58am

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LOL

- jobeek2

February 29, 2008 at 9:27am

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Yesterday, Dayo pointed to Glenn Greenwald's attack on John McCain for accepting the endorsement

- Anonymous

February 29, 2008 at 11:31am

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ironyroad:

They mug for the camera like tough guys but are made uneasy by someone teaching a class on deconstructionism in Nowhere State U or by the fact that peope like to drive a car that actually works.

Mugging for the cameras? We're not the ones out there in stupid pink t-shirts at retarded rallies, slacking off work.

- jwl2672

February 29, 2008 at 1:02pm

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boneill and mmathog:

You two couldn't be more off on the thin skin aspect.  I could give a shit about what you think about Iraq or me or life in general but for the simple fact that your ideas have consequence.  They spread like a virus, infecting others into your thinking.  I had a debate yesterday on economics with someone who was an uneducated simpleton, constantly bringing up banal tropes and aphorisms that are used in the press and by stupid hippie groups.

Were it not for your types, we'd have an aircraft carrier in the Red Sea with missiles aimed at Sudan right now.  Were it not for your types, Iran and N. Korea would not be so bold.  Remember during the early stages of the Iraq invasion? You didn't hear a peep from them cause we annihilated the world's 4th largest army in 3 weeks.  Your words give comfort to the enemy and THAT is why I'm pissed.

- jwl2672

February 29, 2008 at 1:07pm

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"They spread like a virus, infecting others into your thinking."

I thought conservatives believed in individual agency.

"I had a debate yesterday on economics with someone who was an uneducated simpleton,..."

What does that have to do with me? I'll be happy to debate economics with you anytime jwl. think you have the horses for that pal?

"Were it not for your types, we'd have an aircraft carrier in the Red Sea with missiles aimed at Sudan right now."

Huh? By and large, I would say that it is 'my types' (I guess you mean 'liberals') that have been advocating for action in Darfur and 'your types' that have been largely opposed. Unlike you though, I don't have this urge to paint a broad, stupid, angry, reductionist brush and can see that many conservatives have probably advocated for action in Darfur.

"You didn't hear a peep from them cause we annihilated the world's 4th largest army in 3 weeks."

That's true, and here we sit in Iraq, bleeding. Go read this and come back and tell me what a great idea it was.

www.guardian.co.uk/.../iraq.afghanistan

Tell me jwl, did a 'dirty hippie' touch you in college and give you a funny feeling or something?

- mmathog

February 29, 2008 at 1:40pm

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jwl, if you don't like your job, you should quit.

If you feel like you haven't been advanced to your proper position and place, well, that's not my problem.

- mmathog

February 29, 2008 at 1:41pm

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