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JANUARY 22, 2009
BY EVE FAIRBANKS
"Former French President Chirac Hospitalized After Mauling by his Clinically Depressed Poodle"
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Similiarly, George Bush was mauled by a clinically depressed Tony Blair.
January 22, 2009 at 12:42pm
I hate poodles, when I was 7 a French Poodle killed my family's toy terrier. Poodles are miserable creatures.
January 22, 2009 at 1:01pm
The dog's lucky he bit Chirac and not a surrealist director/chef, or we'd be reading about that hot new film at Cannes, "Un Chien Andouille."
[wild, sustained applause!]
Oh, thank you, thankyouverymuch, yer too kind, thank you! I'll be here 'til Tuesday...Try the Maltese!
Oh, please, that's very nice....thank yoooo!...
January 22, 2009 at 1:07pm
yard to get that joke some of us would have to know French, what the hell is an Andouille?
January 22, 2009 at 1:27pm
What's so great about the link you provide is that it serves as a springboard to equally interesting stories. A mother has never loved her 11-year old, Lily Allen parties until 3 AM, Lily Allen wants to bag a rich husband.
January 22, 2009 at 1:40pm
To paraphrase Al Davis, "Just sausage, baby!"
January 22, 2009 at 1:42pm
I hate shrill, yappy small white dogs, especially poodles. These were the dogs who incessantly barked at me in my youth when I walked by their owners' houses. They were never leashed/chained/fenced, and would, snarling, run right up to my skinny ankles, making me fear my own neighborhood. Their owners never seemed to mind that their dogs scared the living shit out of the neighborhood kids.
Many years later, in college, I worked part-time at a store that sold pet items. Like most other dog-goods shops, we allowed the dogs themselves in the store to "shop", and were frequently visited upon by these yappy terrorists who would make life hellish for both myself and the store's owners--these ugly white demons would scare/annoy the store's patrons who would have otherwise spent money in our establishment. And, like my old neighbors, the owners of these beasts never saw the error in their mental frame that held to the belief that these rodents of the canine world posed no psychic stress to everyone else and their mother.
Point being, there is a correlation between ownership of skittish white poodles/malteses and general insolence. I am not suprised to learn that Chirac owns one of these dogs.
January 22, 2009 at 2:09pm
yard to get that joke some of us would have to know French -- what the hell is an Andouille?
$4.99 a pack of four at Trader Joe's.
January 22, 2009 at 2:26pm
Dubya doubt, good one! I was a bit slow on the uptake, but you've now reminded me that Blair was known as Bush's poodle.
January 22, 2009 at 2:30pm
So nice to have you back where you belong.
January 22, 2009 at 2:45pm
blackton, re: Andouille, you might recognize the term if you had a taste for New Orleans style Creole cuisine. Andouille is frequently a key ingredient in gumbo. It might be thought of as a kind of Creole chorizo (with nearly as many varieties in practical use), if that speaks to you. :-)
January 22, 2009 at 3:16pm
Curious, what are symptoms of "clinical depression" in dogs. This incident suggests paranoia, but what if the poodle like many of the rest of us just got fed up?
January 22, 2009 at 3:20pm
Not sure of tep's recent posts bode well for our future, but they certainly Bunuel.
January 22, 2009 at 3:32pm
Imagine if he'd been assaulted by Weather(wo)man Kathy Boudin
January 22, 2009 at 3:44pm
M Yard, vous avez un charme discret, meme s'il n'est pas bourgeois
January 22, 2009 at 3:46pm
Kathy Boudin ???
tep, are you referring obliquely to another kind of Creole sausage?
January 22, 2009 at 3:49pm
y - there's blood on those hands, and inside that sausage
January 22, 2009 at 5:40pm
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